full transcript

From the Ted Talk by Julie Lythcott-Haims: How to raise successful kids -- without over-parenting

Unscramble the Blue Letters


Well, we parents, we parents are pretty sure it's all worth it. We seem to behave — it's like we llietlary think they will have no future if they don't get into one of these tiny set of colleges or creaers we have in mind for them.

Or maybe, maybe, we're just afraid they won't have a future we can brag about to our friends and with seckirts on the backs of our cars. Yeah.

(asplaupe)

But if you look at what we've done, if you have the courage to really look at it, you'll see that not only do our kids think their wotrh comes from grades and scores, but that when we live right up inside their precious developing minds all the time, like our very own veoirsn of the movie "Being John mlcoavkih," we send our children the message: "Hey kid, I don't think you can actually ahvicee any of this without me." And so with our overhelp, our overprotection and oovcreietrdin and hand-holding, we deprive our kids of the chance to build self-efficacy, which is a really fundamental tenet of the human psyche, far more important than that self-esteem they get every time we applaud. Self-efficacy is built when one sees that one's own actions lead to outcomes, not — There you go.

Open Cloze


Well, we parents, we parents are pretty sure it's all worth it. We seem to behave — it's like we _________ think they will have no future if they don't get into one of these tiny set of colleges or _______ we have in mind for them.

Or maybe, maybe, we're just afraid they won't have a future we can brag about to our friends and with ________ on the backs of our cars. Yeah.

(________)

But if you look at what we've done, if you have the courage to really look at it, you'll see that not only do our kids think their _____ comes from grades and scores, but that when we live right up inside their precious developing minds all the time, like our very own _______ of the movie "Being John _________," we send our children the message: "Hey kid, I don't think you can actually _______ any of this without me." And so with our overhelp, our overprotection and _____________ and hand-holding, we deprive our kids of the chance to build self-efficacy, which is a really fundamental tenet of the human psyche, far more important than that self-esteem they get every time we applaud. Self-efficacy is built when one sees that one's own actions lead to outcomes, not — There you go.

Solution


  1. literally
  2. careers
  3. version
  4. stickers
  5. achieve
  6. overdirection
  7. malkovich
  8. worth
  9. applause

Original Text


Well, we parents, we parents are pretty sure it's all worth it. We seem to behave — it's like we literally think they will have no future if they don't get into one of these tiny set of colleges or careers we have in mind for them.

Or maybe, maybe, we're just afraid they won't have a future we can brag about to our friends and with stickers on the backs of our cars. Yeah.

(Applause)

But if you look at what we've done, if you have the courage to really look at it, you'll see that not only do our kids think their worth comes from grades and scores, but that when we live right up inside their precious developing minds all the time, like our very own version of the movie "Being John Malkovich," we send our children the message: "Hey kid, I don't think you can actually achieve any of this without me." And so with our overhelp, our overprotection and overdirection and hand-holding, we deprive our kids of the chance to build self-efficacy, which is a really fundamental tenet of the human psyche, far more important than that self-esteem they get every time we applaud. Self-efficacy is built when one sees that one's own actions lead to outcomes, not — There you go.

Frequently Occurring Word Combinations


ngrams of length 2

collocation frequency
checklisted childhood 3
actions lead 2
harvard grant 2
grant study 2
professional success 2
bonsai trees 2

ngrams of length 3

collocation frequency
harvard grant study 2

Important Words


  1. achieve
  2. actions
  3. afraid
  4. applaud
  5. applause
  6. backs
  7. behave
  8. brag
  9. build
  10. built
  11. careers
  12. cars
  13. chance
  14. children
  15. colleges
  16. courage
  17. deprive
  18. developing
  19. friends
  20. fundamental
  21. future
  22. grades
  23. human
  24. important
  25. john
  26. kid
  27. kids
  28. lead
  29. literally
  30. live
  31. malkovich
  32. mind
  33. minds
  34. movie
  35. outcomes
  36. overdirection
  37. overhelp
  38. overprotection
  39. parents
  40. precious
  41. pretty
  42. psyche
  43. scores
  44. sees
  45. send
  46. set
  47. stickers
  48. tenet
  49. time
  50. tiny
  51. version
  52. worth
  53. yeah