TedTest

From the Ted Talk by Shane Wickes: Why I came out as a gay football coach

Unscramble the Blue Letters

I love football. I started playing when I was 12 years old. It has been a dominant presence in my life ever since. From youth football, to high-school, and coellge, and now as a coach. Football has played a huge role in shiapng me as a person. Recently, I achieved my dream job of becoming vtriasy line coach at my high-school alma metar. Last mcarh I was at a coaching clinic. It was late in the afternoon and I was tired. These coaching clinics can tend to be a bit of a drag at times. Hours and hours, and days and days of the presentations on the x's and o's of football. There was one presentation, though, that looked interesting. It was titled "Disneyland." This presentation chganed my life. This talk was not about the x's and o's of football. But rather about the emotional truth of why we coaches coach. We are coaches so that we can have a meaningful impact on young people's lives, and help them become better people. As coaches, we want to have the kind of impact that assure that one day our prleyas can hold hands with their children and walk into Disneyland. The moarl of this ilcedbrnie message was this: as coaches, we can preach to our players that it is more imoatpnrt for them be better ppolee than it is great football players. But if we are not honest with them and do not pctiacre what we preach, it will never work. In other wrods, teenagers are adept at sensing bllhsiut. (Laughter) As coaches, we must be willing to share our truth. And sharing our turth is the only way we can have the kind of impact we truly want to have. The coach who gave this presentation, his truth was that his son became a drug addict due to the bullying and pressure he was subjected to from his dad being the head football coach at his school in Eagle, ihado, a program that at the time was not very succesful. I went from a presentation on how to run the power against a 3-4 desnfee to the most honest, emotional and inspirational talks on ccaoinhg phioolsphy I'd ever heard. So it got me thinking. What's my bullshit? What is uquine about me that I bring to the tlabe that will have a meaningful impact? What is my truth? My truth is this. I'm a former college football player. I'm a current high-school football ccoah. And I am gay. I btateld with this truth for a long time. Personally, professionally and certainly in my coaching and ahtiletc craeer. It was an identity crisis that had a tremendous impact on my life. Long before I haerd this presentation on Disneyland I thought about cmiong out in football. In the beginning, I told myself "You're gay and you will take it to the grave." Now, I've come a long way since that day. (Applause) Thank you. (Applause) (Cheers) Thank you. I've come a long way since that day, but the prcseos almost cost me my life. I csohe to come out to family and friends starting in August of 2014. I told my immediate family first, and then I clferualy picked my way through family and friends, trying to choose the right time and place. Only being part way out of the closet meant that I had to be two different people and always be very aware of where I was and whom I was with. It caused a constant state of panic and aixntey. So the question became, "Is it important for me to come out pbilulcy?" Yes it is, and here is why. My time in-and-out of the closet helped my realize that there are other people in my situation. And it is not a pretty one. It also helped me realize that coming out is not about sharing my bedroom habits, but about giinvg myself psisrieomn to live my life in its entirety. Let me explain. After talking to one of my fellow coaches, he told me: "I don't talk about my sex life with players, why would you?" And it's a legitimate question, but a common misconception about coming out. Again, I'm not talking about my sex life. I'm talking about my life. It's often said that your private life is your private life. But imagine you are put in a situation where going virtually anywhere and doing very nmarol, healthy, human activities with your significant other could have substantial consequences on your life, reputation and career. You gain a very new perspective on what your private life actually is. That's how being in the closet affected my life. It was quite lliertlay a closet. No space, no freedom and no comfort. It's a suffocating lifestyle with measurable effects. It wore me down until eventually I was abusing alcohol and prescription medications to keep my anxiety in check. It was a hirobrle time in my life. When you are put in a situation of having to live a dbolue life, it strips you off dignity and normal coping mechanisms. At that time the only place I felt somewhat safe was at home. I was living with my parents, who had been nothing but supportive, but I did not feel comfortable bgrnniig guys around them yet. So there I was. No safe place, no pacle to be myself, facnig a new llifetyse I did not know how to navigate, the anxiety and dseeoisprn were ielnspbcaae. And I rsnepdeod the only way I felt I could at the time. Drugs and alcohol. Football teaches so many garet life lessons to those who play or coach. Perseverance, toughness, respect, self-esteem. But the one neviatge thing that it does teach is that being gay is not OK. To be frank, the word "faggot" is used almost as much as the word "football." There is a misconception about the prominence of gay men in football, and it has serious consequences. I'm the perfect example of this issue. An all-state player in high-school. A two-year varsity captain among a select few in school history to go play for a top tier division 1 flabtool program. The youngest line coach in the history of the shocol. And I was ready to kill myself. Because I thought that even though this program was like a second family to me, I feeard they would shun me. It was a crushing weight that I was carrying with me all the time. Months and months of sleep deprivation, severe anxiety and depression. And hsnoelty, a lack of the will to live began to catch up with me. It was too much. I was desperate for a way out. Any way out. One ngiht I rehcead for a bottle of vodka and a couple of pills. I didn't see a way out. I just wnated it to be over. If I couldn't be me and still live my life, what was the point? I passed out on the bathroom folor, and my mom found me. I was fortunate to wake up the next day. I escaped an overdose. It was the scariest moment of my life. When I woke up the next day, I knew I really wasn't ready to give up. And when I heard that talk on Disneyland, I knew how, when and why it was important for me to share my story. I wriroed for so long about how the football community would react. And while at this point only time will tell, my experience has given me a theory. It's simple. One day, being gay in football will be normal. But in order for that to happen, those of us who are gay need to stand up and own it. The coaches I know are perecft examples of this. I have been met with nothing but love and support from my folelw coaching friends. But now the challenge is to change this. And not just on the private lveel. The odds of a gay teen or young adult asnibug drugs, alcohol, or experiencing anxiety, depression, or even attiemptng suicide are drastically high. When it comes to football, the social norm that we've created lveeas many without hope. We've made incredible perorgss in the equal rights movement under the law. But now we must tackle a different problem. Social equality and the message we send to yunog people who play football. Continue to use sports to inspire, connect and to share a positive message. A healthy pesorn cannot live life in the dark. And if you are out there, stand up and own it. Thank you. (alpuapse)

Open Cloze

I love football. I started playing when I was 12 years old. It has been a dominant presence in my life ever since. From youth football, to high-school, and _______, and now as a coach. Football has played a huge role in _______ me as a person. Recently, I achieved my dream job of becoming _______ line coach at my high-school alma _____. Last _____ I was at a coaching clinic. It was late in the afternoon and I was tired. These coaching clinics can tend to be a bit of a drag at times. Hours and hours, and days and days of the presentations on the x's and o's of football. There was one presentation, though, that looked interesting. It was titled "Disneyland." This presentation _______ my life. This talk was not about the x's and o's of football. But rather about the emotional truth of why we coaches coach. We are coaches so that we can have a meaningful impact on young people's lives, and help them become better people. As coaches, we want to have the kind of impact that assure that one day our _______ can hold hands with their children and walk into Disneyland. The _____ of this __________ message was this: as coaches, we can preach to our players that it is more _________ for them be better ______ than it is great football players. But if we are not honest with them and do not ________ what we preach, it will never work. In other _____, teenagers are adept at sensing ________. (Laughter) As coaches, we must be willing to share our truth. And sharing our _____ is the only way we can have the kind of impact we truly want to have. The coach who gave this presentation, his truth was that his son became a drug addict due to the bullying and pressure he was subjected to from his dad being the head football coach at his school in Eagle, _____, a program that at the time was not very succesful. I went from a presentation on how to run the power against a 3-4 _______ to the most honest, emotional and inspirational talks on ________ __________ I'd ever heard. So it got me thinking. What's my bullshit? What is ______ about me that I bring to the _____ that will have a meaningful impact? What is my truth? My truth is this. I'm a former college football player. I'm a current high-school football _____. And I am gay. I _______ with this truth for a long time. Personally, professionally and certainly in my coaching and ________ ______. It was an identity crisis that had a tremendous impact on my life. Long before I _____ this presentation on Disneyland I thought about ______ out in football. In the beginning, I told myself "You're gay and you will take it to the grave." Now, I've come a long way since that day. (Applause) Thank you. (Applause) (Cheers) Thank you. I've come a long way since that day, but the _______ almost cost me my life. I _____ to come out to family and friends starting in August of 2014. I told my immediate family first, and then I _________ picked my way through family and friends, trying to choose the right time and place. Only being part way out of the closet meant that I had to be two different people and always be very aware of where I was and whom I was with. It caused a constant state of panic and _______. So the question became, "Is it important for me to come out ________?" Yes it is, and here is why. My time in-and-out of the closet helped my realize that there are other people in my situation. And it is not a pretty one. It also helped me realize that coming out is not about sharing my bedroom habits, but about ______ myself __________ to live my life in its entirety. Let me explain. After talking to one of my fellow coaches, he told me: "I don't talk about my sex life with players, why would you?" And it's a legitimate question, but a common misconception about coming out. Again, I'm not talking about my sex life. I'm talking about my life. It's often said that your private life is your private life. But imagine you are put in a situation where going virtually anywhere and doing very ______, healthy, human activities with your significant other could have substantial consequences on your life, reputation and career. You gain a very new perspective on what your private life actually is. That's how being in the closet affected my life. It was quite _________ a closet. No space, no freedom and no comfort. It's a suffocating lifestyle with measurable effects. It wore me down until eventually I was abusing alcohol and prescription medications to keep my anxiety in check. It was a ________ time in my life. When you are put in a situation of having to live a ______ life, it strips you off dignity and normal coping mechanisms. At that time the only place I felt somewhat safe was at home. I was living with my parents, who had been nothing but supportive, but I did not feel comfortable ________ guys around them yet. So there I was. No safe place, no _____ to be myself, ______ a new _________ I did not know how to navigate, the anxiety and __________ were ___________. And I _________ the only way I felt I could at the time. Drugs and alcohol. Football teaches so many _____ life lessons to those who play or coach. Perseverance, toughness, respect, self-esteem. But the one ________ thing that it does teach is that being gay is not OK. To be frank, the word "faggot" is used almost as much as the word "football." There is a misconception about the prominence of gay men in football, and it has serious consequences. I'm the perfect example of this issue. An all-state player in high-school. A two-year varsity captain among a select few in school history to go play for a top tier division 1 ________ program. The youngest line coach in the history of the ______. And I was ready to kill myself. Because I thought that even though this program was like a second family to me, I ______ they would shun me. It was a crushing weight that I was carrying with me all the time. Months and months of sleep deprivation, severe anxiety and depression. And ________, a lack of the will to live began to catch up with me. It was too much. I was desperate for a way out. Any way out. One _____ I _______ for a bottle of vodka and a couple of pills. I didn't see a way out. I just ______ it to be over. If I couldn't be me and still live my life, what was the point? I passed out on the bathroom _____, and my mom found me. I was fortunate to wake up the next day. I escaped an overdose. It was the scariest moment of my life. When I woke up the next day, I knew I really wasn't ready to give up. And when I heard that talk on Disneyland, I knew how, when and why it was important for me to share my story. I _______ for so long about how the football community would react. And while at this point only time will tell, my experience has given me a theory. It's simple. One day, being gay in football will be normal. But in order for that to happen, those of us who are gay need to stand up and own it. The coaches I know are _______ examples of this. I have been met with nothing but love and support from my ______ coaching friends. But now the challenge is to change this. And not just on the private _____. The odds of a gay teen or young adult _______ drugs, alcohol, or experiencing anxiety, depression, or even __________ suicide are drastically high. When it comes to football, the social norm that we've created ______ many without hope. We've made incredible ________ in the equal rights movement under the law. But now we must tackle a different problem. Social equality and the message we send to _____ people who play football. Continue to use sports to inspire, connect and to share a positive message. A healthy ______ cannot live life in the dark. And if you are out there, stand up and own it. Thank you. (________)

Solution

changed
football
incredible
people
abusing
facing
young
mater
process
worried
floor
philosophy
inescapable
battled
varsity
bullshit
practice
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normal
coach
truth
coaching
negative
perfect
coming
level
athletic
fellow
night
unique
heard
reached
march
great
school
place
moral
progress
literally
carefully
responded
leaves
bringing
defense
person
players
permission
shaping
publicly
applause
honestly

Original Text

I love football. I started playing when I was 12 years old. It has been a dominant presence in my life ever since. From youth football, to high-school, and college, and now as a coach. Football has played a huge role in shaping me as a person. Recently, I achieved my dream job of becoming varsity line coach at my high-school alma mater. Last March I was at a coaching clinic. It was late in the afternoon and I was tired. These coaching clinics can tend to be a bit of a drag at times. Hours and hours, and days and days of the presentations on the x's and o's of football. There was one presentation, though, that looked interesting. It was titled "Disneyland." This presentation changed my life. This talk was not about the x's and o's of football. But rather about the emotional truth of why we coaches coach. We are coaches so that we can have a meaningful impact on young people's lives, and help them become better people. As coaches, we want to have the kind of impact that assure that one day our players can hold hands with their children and walk into Disneyland. The moral of this incredible message was this: as coaches, we can preach to our players that it is more important for them be better people than it is great football players. But if we are not honest with them and do not practice what we preach, it will never work. In other words, teenagers are adept at sensing bullshit. (Laughter) As coaches, we must be willing to share our truth. And sharing our truth is the only way we can have the kind of impact we truly want to have. The coach who gave this presentation, his truth was that his son became a drug addict due to the bullying and pressure he was subjected to from his dad being the head football coach at his school in Eagle, Idaho, a program that at the time was not very succesful. I went from a presentation on how to run the power against a 3-4 defense to the most honest, emotional and inspirational talks on coaching philosophy I'd ever heard. So it got me thinking. What's my bullshit? What is unique about me that I bring to the table that will have a meaningful impact? What is my truth? My truth is this. I'm a former college football player. I'm a current high-school football coach. And I am gay. I battled with this truth for a long time. Personally, professionally and certainly in my coaching and athletic career. It was an identity crisis that had a tremendous impact on my life. Long before I heard this presentation on Disneyland I thought about coming out in football. In the beginning, I told myself "You're gay and you will take it to the grave." Now, I've come a long way since that day. (Applause) Thank you. (Applause) (Cheers) Thank you. I've come a long way since that day, but the process almost cost me my life. I chose to come out to family and friends starting in August of 2014. I told my immediate family first, and then I carefully picked my way through family and friends, trying to choose the right time and place. Only being part way out of the closet meant that I had to be two different people and always be very aware of where I was and whom I was with. It caused a constant state of panic and anxiety. So the question became, "Is it important for me to come out publicly?" Yes it is, and here is why. My time in-and-out of the closet helped my realize that there are other people in my situation. And it is not a pretty one. It also helped me realize that coming out is not about sharing my bedroom habits, but about giving myself permission to live my life in its entirety. Let me explain. After talking to one of my fellow coaches, he told me: "I don't talk about my sex life with players, why would you?" And it's a legitimate question, but a common misconception about coming out. Again, I'm not talking about my sex life. I'm talking about my life. It's often said that your private life is your private life. But imagine you are put in a situation where going virtually anywhere and doing very normal, healthy, human activities with your significant other could have substantial consequences on your life, reputation and career. You gain a very new perspective on what your private life actually is. That's how being in the closet affected my life. It was quite literally a closet. No space, no freedom and no comfort. It's a suffocating lifestyle with measurable effects. It wore me down until eventually I was abusing alcohol and prescription medications to keep my anxiety in check. It was a horrible time in my life. When you are put in a situation of having to live a double life, it strips you off dignity and normal coping mechanisms. At that time the only place I felt somewhat safe was at home. I was living with my parents, who had been nothing but supportive, but I did not feel comfortable bringing guys around them yet. So there I was. No safe place, no place to be myself, facing a new lifestyle I did not know how to navigate, the anxiety and depression were inescapable. And I responded the only way I felt I could at the time. Drugs and alcohol. Football teaches so many great life lessons to those who play or coach. Perseverance, toughness, respect, self-esteem. But the one negative thing that it does teach is that being gay is not OK. To be frank, the word "faggot" is used almost as much as the word "football." There is a misconception about the prominence of gay men in football, and it has serious consequences. I'm the perfect example of this issue. An all-state player in high-school. A two-year varsity captain among a select few in school history to go play for a top tier division 1 football program. The youngest line coach in the history of the school. And I was ready to kill myself. Because I thought that even though this program was like a second family to me, I feared they would shun me. It was a crushing weight that I was carrying with me all the time. Months and months of sleep deprivation, severe anxiety and depression. And honestly, a lack of the will to live began to catch up with me. It was too much. I was desperate for a way out. Any way out. One night I reached for a bottle of vodka and a couple of pills. I didn't see a way out. I just wanted it to be over. If I couldn't be me and still live my life, what was the point? I passed out on the bathroom floor, and my mom found me. I was fortunate to wake up the next day. I escaped an overdose. It was the scariest moment of my life. When I woke up the next day, I knew I really wasn't ready to give up. And when I heard that talk on Disneyland, I knew how, when and why it was important for me to share my story. I worried for so long about how the football community would react. And while at this point only time will tell, my experience has given me a theory. It's simple. One day, being gay in football will be normal. But in order for that to happen, those of us who are gay need to stand up and own it. The coaches I know are perfect examples of this. I have been met with nothing but love and support from my fellow coaching friends. But now the challenge is to change this. And not just on the private level. The odds of a gay teen or young adult abusing drugs, alcohol, or experiencing anxiety, depression, or even attempting suicide are drastically high. When it comes to football, the social norm that we've created leaves many without hope. We've made incredible progress in the equal rights movement under the law. But now we must tackle a different problem. Social equality and the message we send to young people who play football. Continue to use sports to inspire, connect and to share a positive message. A healthy person cannot live life in the dark. And if you are out there, stand up and own it. Thank you. (Applause)

Frequently Occurring Word Combinations

ngrams of length 2

collocation	frequency
private life	3
line coach	2
football coach	2
sex life	2

Important Words

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